I’m so excited to share my first digital E-Journal, E.S.C.A.P.E.
This Self Care series centers learning around the five parts of our Emotional Intelligence.
Self Awareness - Self Regulation
Motivation - Empathy - Social Skills
The first e-journal is focused on Self Regulation, which provides tools for you to practice the important skills that help us return to our truest form of humanity - back to our Roots. And in case you haven’t been aware, we all need to recognize and remember that the humanity of each one of us is sacred, special and that our lives need not to be stolen, stamped out or squeezed from us. Learning how to care for ourselves is the very foundation of being able to care for others.
So, as the axis of our World is shifting and traumatizing us in new ways daily, whether from the effects of the COVID-19 Pandemic or from the 450 year Pandemic of Race/ism and Systemic Racism that has been hidden in plain sight, we need to be extra careful, empathetic and intentional about our self care and healing, especially with ourselves and the lives around us. Our children are watching - tend to their Spirit along with your own. "They are all our Children, we will Profit from or Pay for, whatever they become" - James Baldwin
It wasn’t until I noticed that my bloody fingernail beds would not heal, my eyelids were bald because I plucked my eyelashes out and the shallowness of my breathing caused dizziness that I could not dismiss. I have been holding my breath waiting for “the day.” The day that my own sons, daughter, son-in-law or nephews would be trapped in the snare of traveling while Black. Even though we have talked and rehearsed the drills for 2 decades, we will never be safe from the landmine of being plucked from the planet by the deadly disease of racism, especially when behind the wheel of a car. I could no longer contain the rage beneath my skin and I was self mutilating and starving myself in preparation for a deeper pain to come. I had to ESCAPE before I hurt myself further or worse, somebody else.
After searching online, I found a Grief and Gratitude Lodge retreat for the weekend. I packed and drove to Port Townsend, dropping “bread crumbs” (evidence along my route of travel) like the Green Book, and found my way to a group of Wailing Women led by the beautiful Story-teller Medicine Woman, Harvest Moon! What a beautiful beginning to my journey back to health and healing my spirit.
I share some of these tools and techniques with you just as I have with students and adults for the purpose of healing. Many have asked me where to start or how to begin to understand the disease and plague of race/ism and systemic racism and my starting place is always with myself. We cannot understand others and move differently through the world without understanding how we got here. Without first acknowledging and recognizing our roots and reconciling with sincere apology for the pain, hurt and devastation of the unwritten invisible rules and how they hurt us all, the reparations and efforts to repair relationships will never fully heal. (my next e-journal-wink)
Our silver lining of our Pandemic is that we are home, all together to listen, learn, love and yes, even lash out a little with each other as we return to our roots of humanity. We are messy and a mess! Let’s use this liminal space to ESCAPE and liberate yourself starting with self care, knowledge and curiosity for one another while you roll up your dress shirt sleeves/scarves and dig up your roots. Again, isn’t that where we all live? Stop climbing mountains of meaningless intellect, no need to starve yourself with shame, denial, ignorance and unrest. Retrace your roots to “the day” of a vinyl record scratching sound, awakening you to race/ism and the effects it has and how we all engage the world. There is a glacier of bias’, behaviors and emotions waiting to be melted so the healing can begin. Let’s ESCAPE and plant the roots of our new world together.
Fernell Miller ~
Healing starts with you...
Download your digital copy of E.S.C.A.P.E here!